It is impossible for me to ever achieve a beautiful life

[JuniorMan]

I m so depressed and tired of being miserable now, I m a 24 year old person from Indian and don't feel good being alive, I mean I never felt like complete alive and happy in my life ever,  Everything in my life was just worse,  I was born with unfortunate fate like a curse, I m so tired of being abused by my parents and so I tired of living a dead life in my poor country,  I m just counting down my days and numbers, feeling like nothing can ever happen good in my life,  and even after all of of these I have so many mental disorders and I m the most below average person in this world, nothing ever achieve anything in my life,

 

I had a only a desire to live a beautiful life with loving caring people in a better western country like the USA, Canada, Europe, but it is the impossible dream,  whenever I see and watch videos other of people like this (https://www.youtube....GkJX-xtA/videos) from my country and others living there so beautiful life with so loving and caring people I feel so emotional and a desperate deadly desire to have it triggers in my heart every single day of time but it is impossible for me to ever achieve it because of my life, I don't even have supportive loving parents,    

 

 

I also want some loving caucasian people in my life and want to live with them in their beautiful countries, and want to eat food with them, travel, fun and want to spend every moment of life with them too, so many things, and want to see the beautiful rays of sunshine for the first time in my life,  and I also want to share my beautiful moments online, I never had anything moment in my life, only a few people get the opportunity in this world.  there is no one to talk in my life, I m soo alone and nobody cares about me not even my own parents, everybody wants me dead, 

 

 

I just like to share my dead down hearted feelings online to random people because I want to let it all out,  I don't know if there is a God or not in this universe but I still pray to him every night, I m so depressed,     I wish I had supportive parents who could support me for my dream but my parents are just very worse and they don't even care if I die or live,  I also so tired of my mental disorders and depression,  I feel so restless, and depressed,  sometimes I feel like death will bring peace at least.

Edited by JuniorMan, 15 September 2019 - 11:18 PM.

[Aqu4]

Stop relying on things you cant have to make you happy. You may never be able to live in the west so appreciate what you have now. True happiness comes from being able to see the beauty in any situation you are in. You cant rely on material things to make you happy.

 

Charles Manson once said an interesting quote: To everyone else he is in prison, but in his mind he is elsewhere with rainbows and unicorns and everything great. He is able to not let his terrible conditions bother him through the power of his mind.

 

You could also check out the stoic mindset that basically says pain and misfortune is the best thing to happen to someone because it allows them to grow and become the best version of them self.

 

When it comes down to it you just have to learn to be more optimistic though.

[vet211]

Can you try being a pastor or something? Do some spiritual stuff, church and that.

[tonu96]

I'm not going to say it isn't a better life in the majority of "the west" than it is in most of India, but it's definitely not as great as you make it out to be. There's still poverty and people who mistreat each other. In fact, India is poised to become one of the fastest growing technology powers soon. Perhaps try to learn some of this and get out of your parents' house and life to forge your own life that you want. If you still want to leave the country and Europe and North America aren't possible, maybe try to go east somewhere like South Korea, Japan, or Singapore. I'm sure it's much harder where you are at, but there are opportunities out there if you work hard enough to achieve them. Then, when you have forged your own path it will be even greater than what you are currently imagining because you had to work hard for it rather than coming across it by luck.

[Grotokid]

Agreed with the others.

i agree with you that life is hard but we have to forge our path. 

As a person who suffer with depression , i know its difficult as rampaging thoughts always get int he way . but we will find a way.

cause thats the only way.

[bakwan500]

Stop comparing your life to others. Don't let people decide what you have to do. I hope that I can help you in the future